The Realest Gift Guide Ever For The Men In Your Life

Shopping for a guy can be hard. Men are a mystery so it can be a challenge. So here are some ideas that are sure to end with a smile or at least a high five.

1) Billy Jealousy ‘Beard Envy’ Kit

Does your man’s beard that you pretend to find sexy actually smell like shit? Then this is the perfect gift to buy him. Not only does it come with beard shampoo & conditioner, scissors to keep things tidy but still rugged as hell, but it also comes with a brush to keep things nice and untangled. It’s a win/win for both and a present your man is sure to appreciate. At a reasonable price, it’s perfect for a stocking stuffer.

Shop: Billy Jealous ‘Beard Envy’ Kit

2) Boostcase ‘Power Case’ iPhone 6 & 6S Case and Battery

Tired of your man going out with the guys and coincidentally having his phone die resulting in him missing your 87 calls wondering what time he will be home, who he is with, and wondering if he will bring you back some Phish Food & a Big Mac Meal? Well let me solve that problem for you…I present to you a case that charges his phone while he is out. No more clever excuses as to why his sorry ass can’t text you back now.

Shop: Boostcase ‘Power Case’ iPhone 6 & 6S Case and Battery

3) Beercap Shadow Box

A little concerned your man’s casual (but consistent) 6 pack of beer after work is actually turning into full blown alcoholism? Fear no more. With this gift you can subtly make him believe you aren’t nagging him about his drinking problem but actually making it fun. When he fills this Beercap Shadow Box to the top in a little under a week then hopefully he will come to the realization HIMSELF that things might be a little awry. Cheers to that, am I right?

Shop: Beercap Shadow Box

4) G-Shock ‘Big Combi’ Watch

Trouble in paradise because your guy seems to be always mistaking the time and making it home right after both of your favorite shows end? We all know there is nothing more in life your man would rather be doing every night than snuggling up on the couch with some cheap $5 moscato and watching Scandal, every franchise of the Real Housewives, Vanderpump Rules, Scream Queens and the Kardashians, right? Well now he will never accidentally forget what time it is and will always make it home to enjoy this “quality” time with you.

Shop: G-Shock ‘Big Combi’ Watch

5) Herschel Supply Co. ‘Novel’ Duffel Bag

Is life telling you that maybe this relationship has run it’s course and should not carry into the New Year? Scared to end things during the Holiday even though it’s clear you will never be able to spend another second around his family? Not sure how to get all of his shit out of your place? Soften the blow by packing all of his shit into this cool ass duffel bag and send him on his way.

Shop: Herschel Supply Co. ‘Novel’ Duffel Bag

Goodbye 2015, We Out This Bitch! Top 5 Pop Culturey Things That Defined My Year

Can I be the first one to say that I am so over 2015. This bitch has got to go. We still have about 15 days left and this 15 days too damn long. Even though there were point during this year that made me want to pull my hair out and give up on everything, there were some really great things that happened this year. So here are some some of the things that stood out to me in pop culture this year. And by stood out I mean I was way too emotionally invested into every single thing listed below:

*Kylie Jenner’s Lip Injections*

Kylie Jenner got lip injections this year. Which wasn’t that big of a deal. I mean it was probably just as fucking casual/shocking as her illegally dating a mediocre, chipmunk resembling Tyga. Let me rephrase that, it wouldn’t have been a big deal if she had just did the injections once and left it at the cute little size she had. But this bitch went in on her lips. Taking the size from “Oh, that’s cool. She looks great” to “You look like your mother (Kris Jenner) in the Dominican Republic when she had an allergic reaction to something she ate and she looked like the mayor of Whoville”.

Source: giphy.com

*Scream Queens Was Introduced To The World*

Scream Queens single handedly became the number one commitment in my life in just one night. With an all star cast that God himself (Ryan Murphy) blessed us with we were introduced to the most pop culture centric show of all time. If you hated this show, I automatically have to believe that you are stupid and just do not understand great comedy. As if Nick Jonas’ character Boone faking his death and then disguising himself as Joaquin Phoenix wasn’t good enough we were given outstanding performances from the likes of Jamie Lee Curtis, Lea Michele, Whoever The Guy Who Played Chad Was, Neicey Nash, KeKe Palmer, and Abigail Breslin. With untouchable cameos by Ariana Grande, Chad Michael Murray and Allen Thicke. Also, an outstanding soundtrack of every iconic 80’s power ballad, 90’s Top 40 hits, and scene appropriate song you could imagine. Every line is so perfectly thought out and timed that you really have to be paying attention to capture the full appeal. Also, I am living for Neicey Nash in some couture. There is so much more I could say about this life changing series but I will be doing full episode recaps during the next season. Stay tuned.

*Adele Released ‘Hello’*

Shit. Honestly, I don’t know if it’s a good idea to relive this again but I’m going to send myself into an emotional tailspin for all you sad motherfuckers like me. The day Adele released ‘Hello’ my day went like this: I left work, pulled out my computer and pressed play, immediately started hyperventilating and drooling everywhere from sobbing so hard, proceeded to change into a matching grey baggy sweatsuit (aka a groutfit), closed all the blinds/turned off all the lights, and then ordered a pizza to fill my emotional void as I texted every single ex boyfriend, hook up, and  guy I never met and was probably catfished by. EVER. After receiving 0 responses, I then proceeded to listen to ‘Hello’ on a continuous loop for 27 days straight. It was a very melodramatic period in my life filled with raw emotion and passion. Thank you for that, Adele.

Source: Giphy

*Lamar Odom Overdosed at a Brothel While Taking A Multitude of Drugs Including Herbal Viagra*

This is probably the most traumatizing thing that has happened to me. Ever. Not even just in 2015. The only event that has ever hit me harder than this is when Khloe divorced (but didn’t????? SUSPECT) Lamar and that is only winning because it had a longer lasting emotional effect on my psyche. Anyways, for a few days I truly believed I was going to log onto Twitter and have E! News confirm that Lamar had passed away as a result of partying with two ugly ass hookers at Dennis Hof’s love ranch and taking herbal viagra (which by the way….WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?) Anyways, Lamar has continued to survive with his estranged wife who is also James Harden’s girlfriend by his side. Thank God.

Source: Giphy

 

*Lisa Rinna Joined The Cast Of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Accused Kim Richards of Relapsing*

I don’t even need to give an explanation for this. I just need you to watch this:

 

“Why don’t you have a piece of bread” pic.twitter.com/QZObuG2Qf8

— milf bitch (@nicolemilfie) December 11, 2015

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING. HOPE YOU LOVE. XOXO

Exclusive Online Shopping Deals For My Readers!

Hey everyone.

I hate Christmas shopping more than anything. Going to the mall right now is actually like being selected for the Hunger Games and I am not for it. So I have stuck to online shopping to get the job done because what’s better than spending a lot of money on all the idiots in your life (jk I love everybody who I am buying presents for hence why I am now on welfare after finishing my Christmas shopping).

So I’ve put together a list to all the websites that are having some special offers. With each deal I’ve included the code or specifications so make sure to read how to apply the discount! Enjoy my loves!

-JC Penny: 15 % off with the code ‘JCPSAV15’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

-Shoes.com : 25 % off $99 with code ‘womenswinter’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

-Shoes.com: 25 % off $99 with code ‘menswinter’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

-Famous Footwear- extra 15% off with code ‘FROST15’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

– Restoration Hardware- extra 20% off with code ‘private’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

-Banana Republic- extra 40 % off with code ‘BRSALE’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

-White House Black Market- extra 30% off with code ‘70298’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

-Kohl’s- 20 % off with code ‘wreath20’ CLICK HERE TO SHOP

ENJOY GUYS!

 

5 Face Products You Need To Use This Winter

Winter is the most fucked up thing ever that can happen to your face. This weather causes me to have dry, red, absolutely appalling skin. When I get out of the shower and look in the mirror, I actually scare the shit out of myself. I look physically ill. And it’s all thanks to the Satan of the seasons: Winter. It also might have to do something with all the emotional eating I’ve been doing with disgusting processed foods because I’m depressed when I go outside. But who knows. All I know is I’m pale as fuck, dry, red, and look like Gollum without makeup during this season and that’s not a way to live.  And don’t even get me started on the chapped mess my lips are. RIP.

THIS IS ACTUALLY ME LOOKING IN THE MIRROR AFTER I GET OUT OF THE SHOWER IN THE MORNING. TERRIFYING. FUCKING TERRIFYING.

So I did what any girl would do when they feel a little uglier than usual. I turned to Sephora. And let me tell you. I could have saved a lot of money had I not done that. A lot of goddamn money.  But all in all, it was money well spent because I’m feeling like myself again. Here are the 5 products I’ve been using daily so I can avoid wearing a ton of make up:

1)  Urban Decay B6 Vitamin-Infused Complexion Spray

Okay, I know whenever I review a product and I love it, I go a little overboard telling you how much I like it. But guys, this a product that I will never ever give up. It is absolutely incredible. I have been using it for about a week now and each day my skin looks a little better. It’s almost completely gotten rid of the redness on my skin which has been my biggest insecurity. I use it every morning before I apply my make up and also every night when I take my makeup off before bed. It’s the number one product I would recommend, whether you think you have good skin or not. This will only improve it. Pick it up immediately.

Shop: Urban Decay B6 Vitamin-Infused Complexion Spray

2) Philosophy The Microdelivery Exfoliating Wash

I’ve actually told you guys about this product before but it’s too good to leave out of this list. I use it every time I shower. It does an amazing job of scrubbing off all dry skin and leaving your face incredibly smooth making it a billion times easier to apply your make up. I live and die for this. If you haven’t already joined us in using this product, please get with it.

Shop: Philosophy The Microdelivery Exfoliating Wash

3) Bliss Fabulips Treatment Kit

This is incredible. I dunno about you but I hate when my lips are chapped and in the winter these babies stay looking crazy. So every morning when I get out of the shower I always use this treatment kit. It comes with a scrub and a little tool that spins around your lips which gets rid of all the gross shit and also plumps them a little. Win/win.

Shop: Bliss Fabulips Lip Treatment

4) fresh Creme Ancienne Ultimate Nourishing Honey Mask

I use this mask every sunday to restart my skin for the week. This formula does an amazing job of retaining moisture and hydrating your skin which is necessary in this season. You will love this.

Shop: fresh Creme Ancienne Ultimate Nourishing Honey Mask

5) Clinique Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion

I’ve also blogged about this product but it is my number one secret to good skin. I have my mom and grandma to thank for putting me on to this cult classic but there will never be another moisturizer I use. The proof/results are in my grandmother’s lack of wrinkles. WHY HAVEN’T YOU STARTED USING THIS YET???

Shop: Clinique Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion 

 

 

 

5 Booties You Need Right Now

It’s winter. And winter sucks balls. I run cold blooded so being freezing is constantly messing with my outfits. With all of these cute booties though at least you can keep your ugly winter feet covered and warm 🙂

Click on the links for prices and to shop!

ACNE Studios Jensen Suede Ankle Boot

Jeffrey Campbell Orwell Suede Ankle Boot

Vince Faber Open Toe Leather Bootie

Alexander Wang Metal Cutout Heel ‘Gabi’

Isabel Marant Brown Patsha Suede Ankle Boot

 

 

 

5 Heels Under $40 You Need Right Now

You can never have enough pairs of heels. Here are a few pairs from Forever21 that you can afford to add to your closet now. Shop the heels by clicking on the picture!

Platform Ankle Strap Sandals $29.90

Faux Leather Pumps $29.90

Caged Faux Suede Bootie $34.90

Faux Suede Booties $27.90

Pointed Faux Suede Pumps $29.90